Tuesday, June 17

This Stella's For You

I saw in the paper that the Belgian brewery company InBev wants to buy Anheuser Busch. That's Anheuser Busch as in the makers of Budweiser, the most American beer on the market.

InBev's flagship beer is something called "Stella Artois".

I'm willing to bet that a substantial majority of Budweiser drinkers cannot even pronounce "Artois".

So what are we to expect once these Belgians have taken over our beloved Bud?

Will we see some ersatz Hercule Poirot coming home from a hard day of sleuthing and cooing "'Astings, decant for me the Weiser of the Bud, s'il vous plait. I must refresh the little gray cells, 'Astings. The little gray cells."

And what about the Clydesdales? Can we expect to see them put out to pasture, only to be reproduced in chocolate - dark, bittersweet, and milk?

While you're at it why not just throw some chocolate right in the beer, Belgians? And you might as well add a couple of Brussel sprouts too!

As you may have guessed I'm against this deal. I don't want to appear to be an isolationist, but I think we all remember what happened a few years ago when the Japanese bought Montana for the beef.

1 comment:

Tallulah Morehead said...

Darling, I'm booking my trip to EuroBusch Gardens now!

Any chance we could convince the Belgians to buy Bush rather than Busch? Because investigating the crimes of The Bush Administration should keep Poirot's little gray cells busy as all hell.