My beautiful wife.
My handsome sons.
My good health
George W. Bush's remaining time in office: 424 days.
Days until my next day of thanks: 371
George W. Bush's remaining time in office on my next day of thanks: 53 days.
Sports Figure Indicted for Thoughts
------------- ---------------------- -------------------------------
Michael Vick Dog Fighting Hey, nobody died.
Barry Bonds Obstruction of Justice Hey, nobody died.
O.J. Simpson Armed Robbery Hey, nobody died.
'God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot insult;
courage to insult the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.'"
"Come on in, Art. I'm Sid Tishman, deputy sub assistant for project acquisitions. Whaddya got for me?"
"Well, it's the story of a private consulting detective..."
"Private eye, eh? Not bad. Right now there's only Monk, and he's a little too eccentric for my taste. Your guy isn't eccentric, is he?"
"Well, he plays the violin..."
"We'll lose that in a hurry. Unless we can build some kind of weapon into the violin. Yeah! That'll work. A violin with an automatic weapon in it. 'Stradivarius, P.I.' What do you think?"
"Actually, his name is Sherlock Holmes."
"Sherlock Holmes? Sounds like a burglar alarm. Holmes isn't bad, though. But Chad Holmes, maybe. 'There's No Place Like Holmes. P.I.' What do you think? Chad Holmes and his sexy assistant, Brandie."
"His assistant is named Dr. Watson."
"Nah, nah, nah. That won't work. There's already too many medical shows. You got your House, your ER, your Grey's...Plus our new reality show Who Wants To Take Out My Kidney. Nope, no medical. How about we make it Brandie Watson?"
"I don't know about..."
"Good! Now, can he see ghosts?"
"It's the latest. Crime busting clairvoyant ghost chasers. Can he do that?"
"There was a hound once that was rather spectral."
"Spectral! I love it! 'Spectral Stradivarius, P.I.' They'll eat it up."
"Look, old fellow, I'm not at all sure..."
"It's a done deal. I'll have my people get in touch with your people and we'll go from there."
|George W. Bush|
(spoken quickly) "Come-to-me-angel-of-music"
(sung with audience) "Come to me angel of muuuuusic."
(sung) "I am your angel of muuuuusic"
John - 4 Presidents: John Adams, John Quincy Adams, John Tyler, and John Kennedy.
Not to mention Andrew and Lyndon Johnson
Hillary - 0 Presidents
Rudolph - 0 Presidents
Mitt - 0 Presidents
Barack - Only 1: Barack "Thomas" Jefferson
"In truthe, woof, woof."